Association for the promotion of affective wellbeing and sexual health

What do we mean by education on intimacy and sexuality? Why is it important to cultivate it in the context of disability? First of all, let us dispel some common myths. It is often believed that intimacy and sexuality education leads participants to develop inappropriate attitudes, instills unnatural desires, or pushes people to do what they would not otherwise do. It is also sometimes said that such education “unleashes” libido. LoveLife does not do this. Nor is it a group of sexual assistants who engage in sexual activity with users or who provoke inappropriate behaviors in others.

All LoveLife interventions aim to enhance the quality of life of people, especially those with intellectual disabilities and atypical development, as well as their caregivers. We believe that when a person can relate to their own needs with competence, awareness, and respect, they are more likely to meet those needs, increase their satisfaction and well-being, and, as a result, improve the well-being of those around them.

Rather than “unleashing a drive,” LoveLife supports adaptive behaviors (socially acceptable and respectful of personal dignity), so that desires for self-realization and unmet or unrecognized needs do not result in problematic behaviors such as outbursts of anger, distraction and low concentration, anxiety, or depression. Instead, they are guided toward self-satisfaction and healthier relationships with others.

Love and sexuality are deeply significant and highly complex aspects of human life. In certain situations, such as disability, it can be even more difficult to manage impulses, to accept a “no,” and so on. For this reason, adequate support is needed. All people, including those with disabilities, seek pleasure: the pleasure of being with others, of being accepted, of being cared for and embraced, and they also experience sexual desire. Our goal is to make all of this more possible and more accessible.

When these needs and interests are not addressed, they may lead to maladaptive and dysfunctional behaviors, such as exposing genitals in public places or insisting on constant hugs, even from strangers. The consequences of such behaviors can include high levels of frustration, isolation, anger, self-exclusion, or self-imposed restrictions.

This harms not only the life of the person with a disability, but also the lives of their family and relational community. Learning how to deal with this reality—the normality of desiring to be with others, to love and to feel loved—is nothing less than the realization of the right to happiness.

LoveLife operates in line with the principles of well-being and sexual health of the United Nations Convention on the Rights of Persons with Disabilities (CRPD, 2006). It also adopts the strategies promoted by the World Health Organization (2006, 2010, 2015) and UNESCO’s International Technical Guidance on Sexuality Education (2009, 2018). In addition, our main reference models are the Declaration of Sexual Rights of the World Association for Sexual Health (WAS, 2008) and the Standards for Sexuality Education in Europe developed by the WHO Regional Office for Europe and BZgA (2014), later adopted by the Italian Ministry of Health (2020).

If you know someone with a child, brother, sister, or cousin with intellectual disabilities or atypical development (Down syndrome, autism, etc.), you will understand how difficult it can be for them to manage their emotions and relationships. They may want to hug everyone and struggle to tolerate being refused, or they may become extremely upset if someone touches them unexpectedly.

Some may undress in public or rub against others because they do not know appropriate ways to respond to their sexual impulses. Sometimes they fall in love with people who then take advantage of them, exploiting the vulnerability that makes it difficult for them to set and maintain personal boundaries. They may find it hard to form friendships with peers, want friends who are not genuinely interested in them, or, after experiencing frustrations, choose to withdraw from certain relationships.

Like everyone else, they have the right to love themselves, to love and be loved, as well as to experience pleasure and to feel comfortable alone or with others.

At LoveLife, we run individual and group projects to support families in creating healthy, effective, and fulfilling relationships for and with their children.

We are a multidisciplinary team of young adults and professionals, including psychologists, anthropologists, and educators, with expertise in experiential learning and creative problem-solving in the areas of intimacy and sexuality.

If you know someone who might benefit from our support, please share our contact information with them.

Thank you sincerely.